During this high season of gift giving, I find myself in awe of those who always seem to select an object that is truly desired. Large household appliances or
saccharine holiday PJs are obviously devoid of deep thought, while even pretty gifts can seem empty and shallow. Enter Jeanine Payer, who for almost two decades has been perfecting the art of crafting presents as profound as they are aesthetically pleasing. The San Francisco–based jewelry designer creates baubles inscribed with poetry and prose that attract retailers such as Barneys New York and a star-studded clientele that includes Julia Roberts, Mick Jagger, and Sheryl Crow. Her clients reject boring bling in favor of artisanal pieces with less glitz and more gravitas. Her secret is no surprise: choosing a memorable present requires thought, observation, and something more precious today than any jewel—time.

---

Gift-Giving 101. What advice would you give to those looking for the perfect present? For years, I gave things that I wanted for myself, but then I realized that was really selfish. Instead, spend time thinking about what the other person wants. It is a harder gift to give, but much more meaningful.

Your jewelry seems to attract contemplative types. Some take weeks to select a piece of poetry. Special gifts take time. A man who just comes in and says, “I’ll take that one,” without even looking at the inscription, is doing the opposite.

We all have such horror stories. What advice would you give to a thoughtless oaf? Pay attention to the clues being dropped, either consciously or unconsciously. Call the person’s friends and have a brainstorming session with them. The people who really know you well will say, “Don’t buy that, buy this!”

Is there any type of jewelry a man—or a woman—shouldn’t attempt to give? Rings are a nightmare gift, and I say so selfishly, because ours have engraving all around the ring—so if it doesn’t fit, we have to redo it all. The problem is that people are not experts at finding out their partner’s ring size. They come in with a piece of string tied into the size of their partner’s finger, or a circle drawn on a piece of paper.

So, instead of a ring? I’d suggest a necklace. Pendants are suitable for men and women. We have one in silver engraved with an Apache saying: “May you walk gently through the world and know its beauty all the days of your life.”

Should a jewelry purchaser be concerned about fashion? Harper’s Bazaar just proclaimed that charms are out. They did? Oh no! Seriously, jewelry is affected somewhat by fashion, but it’s less about hemlines and more about necklines. In the mid-’90s, long pendants were favored. Five years ago, they got really short, up to about 15 inches. Now, longer pendants are back: the new short is 18 inches.

Is there a more casual type of jewelry to give? I like to give vintage designs or Alexis Bittar’s lucite flower pins and bangles. He’s my dear friend and his hand-carved work is so bright and cheerful.
 
What type of inscription do people choose most, the romantic or the inspirational? The latter, without being too Hallmarky. At first our phrases were more esoteric, like Longfellow’s “turn of the tide,” but “the soul is here for its own joy,” by Rumi, is more accessible. I used to take poetry from the public domain, but now I also work with contemporary poets, like Jane Hirschfield and Stephen Mitchell. Poetry is very much alive.

Any week now, you’ll be having your first child, a boy. Have you chosen an inscription for him? Yes, but I can’t read it—I’ll cry. It’s by Rumi, inscribed on a silver spoon. Boys don’t wear much jewelry.

Growing up, were you some kind of bookish poetry geek? I read a lot, but not necessarily poetry. Words were always important in my house—my mother was head of the conservatory at A.C.T. She was the one who exposed me to Rilke.

These days, graffiti decorates bags and quotations are stenciled on kitchen walls. Words have become ubiquitous as a design motif. A lot of it is dumbed down. Rings say things like love. What does that mean? “I love potato chips”? “I love you”? Comparing objects with a one-word message to those with a poem is like saying that cotton candy and filet mignon are both foods.

You’re probably one of those people who make their own holiday cards, too. No, I’m terrible at that! If I want a gorgeous holiday card, I go to Gump’s.

And fill it with a personal, significant quote? I never use quotes, because I’m all quoted out. I pick blank cards and write something short and meaningful that I wouldn’t normally say to that person. Cards with writing are a way to avoid having to really think about what to express.

Were you always a jewelry person? No. When my grandmother said she was going to give me her jewelry one day, I couldn’t have cared less.

What inspired you? I studied art and sculpture and I’ve always been interested in miniatures. When I was around 6 or 7, I used to make miniatures in clay. I had a dollhouse growing up. What I do is sort of an extension of that. The challenge is to make a piece on which an appropriate phrase will fit.

The challenge is reading those inscriptions! The script is so tiny. Middle-aged folks like me have to use a magnifying glass. We sell those, too.

 

Where you can’t go wrong
Payer’s top picks for personalized gifts:

Cursive New York
“For the best small gifts, from Marie Papier to gorgeous pens to objects. It is located inside ABC Carpet & Home.” 888 Broadway, N.Y., 646-602-3806, cursivenewyork.com.

Gump’s San Francisco                                                                                      "For everything from cards to vintage cuff links, along with the perfect leather box to put them in. I love the soaps, bath products, luxury chocolates, and olive oils.” 135 Post St., S.F., 800-766-7628.

Megcohendesign.com
“For the best cashmere scarves in the world for the men and women in my life.”

The Gardener, Berkeley and San Francisco                                                        “For beautiful, functional gifts, from small handmade vases to gorgeous wooden bowls to books.” Ferry Building Marketplace, S.F., 415-981-8181; 1836
4th St., Berkeley, 510-548-4545.